


An Interesting Proposition

by ChannelTheFlannel



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Asexual Character, Asexual Relationship, Asexuality, Awkward Flirting, Awkwardness, Banter, Flirting, Getting Together, M/M, New Year's Eve, New Years, Out of Character, Short
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-29
Updated: 2015-12-29
Packaged: 2018-05-03 22:43:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 965
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5309810
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChannelTheFlannel/pseuds/ChannelTheFlannel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>An asexual walks into a bar.<br/>Or: This is not another one of Potter's jokes.</p>
            </blockquote>





	An Interesting Proposition

**Author's Note:**

> Kinda ridiculous but I had fun writing it ^_^

It was New Year's Eve, and Draco was at a new low.

He was at the Leaky Cauldron, waiting around for Pansy and Blaise to arrive, though he had a sneaking suspicion that they had shown him up. So, he was sulking at the bar, sipping one of the frilly drinks he could just  _barely_ tolerate. _  
_

To make everything a thousand times worse, Potter was there with his friends. The Weasel, the Weasel Twin, the Weaselette (who had recently come out as lesbian, which made him inexplicably grateful), Granger, and Longbottom were all there, laughing happily.

Potter didn't look as well as the others. In fact, he looked as though he could use a good shag (or something). 

Not that Draco was going to offer one. He had long since come to terms with the fact that he was never getting into Potter's pants, pretty as he was. He didn't even think about it. It didn't bother him a single bit.

He didn't even think about it when Potter walked up to him, a flirtatious grin on his face. Draco was certain many lesser people would have swooned at the sight, but not Draco.

He didn't swoon. Not for anyone.

Though, if he did swoon, he would probably swoon for Potter. Potter with his pretty caramel skin and green eyes. Draco didn't experience sexual attraction, but he could appreciate a lovely looking person. He always had.

"What's brought you here tonight, Malfoy?" Potter asked him, nudging him good-naturedly.

Draco didn't know when they had gotten to _good-natured_ terms, but he certainly didn't mind it. After all, it was New Year's Eve, and he was lonely. He could handle good-natured.

"Celebration," he replied dryly. "Why everyone else is here, isn't it?"

Potter raised an eyebrow, but it was lopsided, and Draco realized that the other man was most likely a little tipsy.

"But you're all alone." Potter leaned into him and nudged his shoulder again, his breath hot on Draco's collar bone. "You're not s'posed to celebrate alone."

"Well, I am," he answered, edging away. "I doubt you would care to remedy that, though." He left it open ended, in case Potter _did_ want to remedy it.

Potter smiled and tilted his head. "I might," he answered, his voice gone low. "You've always been nice-looking, Malfoy. Want to come home with me?" 

Draco rolled his eyes. "Not a chance, Potter," he growled, turning his head. "I don't 'shag,' you see. I'm asexual. Have you heard of it?"

Potter gasped quietly, and he grasped Draco's shoulder. "The Slytherin Sex God?" he demanded incredulously, shaking the shoulder feebly. "So, the rumors are false, then?"

Draco curled his lip and glowered at him. "What, did you think I was going to be a cheap shag?" he demanded.

"No," Potter answered, the word rolling lazily off his tongue. "Just thought it would be hard to ward off all your other suitors." He chuckled as if he had made a funny joke.

"What, like yourself?" Draco smirked at him. "No, Potter, I manage. My sharp tongue normally chases people off."

Potter nodded pensively and licked his lips, but didn't say anything. Draco rolled his eyes and was about to turn away, but he was interrupted.

"Do you want to cuddle?" Potter asked quickly.

Draco snapped his head to attention. "What did you just say?" 

"D'you want to cuddle?" Potter repeated, slower this time. "Since you don't want to shag, maybe we could cuddle. I'm pretty great at it." He attempted to waggle his eyebrows suggestively, but failed miserably.

Draco narrowed his eyes, but he couldn't help but feel secretly pleased.

"If it's just _cuddling_ , then I don't see why I should decline," he replied, smiling at him. "Your friends won't mind if you leave?"

Potter snorted. "They're too drunk to notice I've even left the table." He ducked his head in towards Draco and grabbed his elbow. "Let's get out of here."

Draco grinned and went with Potter towards the exit, feeling smug as he wondered about the next morning's headlines. There was bound to be an undercover reporter already snapping photographs.

Once they were outside, Potter snorted again, and he was giggling, his arm already sliding around Draco's waist.

"What is it now?" he demanded, admittedly amused by the behavior.

"Draco Malfoy likes to cuddle." Potter snickered again, as if this were another one of his jokes. "You're asexual."

"If you think it's funny, you can leave," Draco growled, pulling away.

Potter's eyes widened, and he pulled Draco back in. "No!" he cried, and Draco could smell alcohol barely tinging his breath. "That's not fair, Malfoy."

"Why not?"

"Because I'm tipsy, and I'm ace, too."

Draco stiffened in surprise. "Then why did you ask me about a shag?" he demanded.

Potter grinned and bumped his nose into Draco's shoulder. "I never said anything about shagging," he mumbled. "Just coming home with me. I heard the rumors, so I knew what you'd say."

Draco relaxed, and inexplicably felt like he could trust him, so he did the only thing he could think to do--he tentatively wrapped an arm around him.

"I never heard about you," he countered.

"That's 'cause I don't flaunt my life for the world to see," Harry replied haughtily. "I bet you haven't heard about my dating habits, either."

"Whatever." Draco rolled his eyes. "Everyone will know about this if we don't apparate away soon."

Potter apparently hadn't realized this, and he let go of Draco completely, though he twined their fingers together.

"Your place?" he suggested.

Draco responded by apparating them away right then, focusing on the happy thought that for once, he wouldn't be alone on New Year's.

Even better, though, was the thought that he'd be getting a good cuddle out of it, too.


End file.
